Women should come with an instruction manual...

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Karagin
04/17/02 10:51 PM
63.173.170.88

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I have been dating this girl for almost a year now and she keeps claiming that I don't understand her and that I can't read her...

Now tell me how I can do those two things right IF she keeps changing the rules on me?
Karagin

Given time and plenty of paper, a philosopher can prove anything.
Black_Phoenix
04/17/02 10:55 PM
207.252.105.154

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I have no girlfriend, but I can tell you this much. Give up trying to understand her. Just go bang your head on a wall, it's a lot less painful.
History is much like an endless waltz. The three beats of war, peace and revolution continue on forever.
-Gundam Wing: Endless Waltz

Karagin
04/17/02 10:58 PM
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I have been doing that and she tells me I am doing it wrong...
Karagin

Given time and plenty of paper, a philosopher can prove anything.
Bob_Richter
04/17/02 10:58 PM
134.121.16.52

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(My profuse apologies to Slayer. I COULD NOT PASS THIS UP!)

But you can't even understand or read ENGLISH. What makes you think you can handle WOMEN?!

>>>Now tell me how I can do those two things right IF she keeps changing the rules on me? <<<

You can't. It is impossible for any man to understand any woman to any meaningful extent. Give up.

(Conversely, it is impossible for any woman to understand any man to any meaningful extent.)
-Bob (The Magnificent) Richter

Assertions made in this post are the humble opinion of Bob.
They are not necessarily statements of fact or decrees from God Himself, unless explicitly and seriously stated to be so.
:)
Black_Phoenix
04/17/02 11:01 PM
207.252.105.154

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I'd tell ya to just place yourself in a coma and get it over with, but I figure she'll say you're doing that wrong too.
History is much like an endless waltz. The three beats of war, peace and revolution continue on forever.
-Gundam Wing: Endless Waltz

Karagin
04/17/02 11:04 PM
63.173.170.88

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True she would more then likely tell me that I messed that up...but hey she does have her good points...now if I could only remember them...
Karagin

Given time and plenty of paper, a philosopher can prove anything.
Nightward
04/18/02 02:36 AM
203.134.13.194

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You'd better hope she is not able to read or comprehend English, Karagin...by using my incredible powers of deduction, I forsee a lot of yelling if she ever sees this thread

There *ARE* rules for dealing with women. Ettiquette and Protocol are excellent crutches to fall back on, and they have the added bonus of making the female you're using it on feel special and think that you are anachronistic and oddly charming. Hey, it works for me...
Yea, verily. Let it be known far and wide that Nightward loathes MW: DA. Indeed, it is with the BURNING ANIMUS OF A THOUSAND SUNS that he doth rage against it with.
Spartan
04/18/02 04:54 PM
172.169.248.90

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Don't try to understand women Karagin. I tried to apply logic to a woman once and it nearly killed me. It took me a month to recover physically from the mental strain. I never quite recovered my senses though.
Spartan

We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty.

(I refer you to what Nightward said)
Nightward
04/18/02 06:46 PM
203.134.13.194

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I am sort of reminded of Jack Nicholson's line in that movie with Helen Hunt, when he is asked how he writes women so well. He says 'I think of a man, then I remove reason and accountability.'. Hehehe...

Seriously, though...At Uni, in my science course, males are out numbered about 10:1. So it's a bad idea to antagonise them.
Yea, verily. Let it be known far and wide that Nightward loathes MW: DA. Indeed, it is with the BURNING ANIMUS OF A THOUSAND SUNS that he doth rage against it with.
Spartan
04/18/02 09:17 PM
172.172.53.23

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Wow! I wish I had that problem. At my school, at least in the department of engineering the ratio is reversed. It's more like 10:1 or probably closer 15:1 boys to girls. Makes it hard to meet women.
Spartan

We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty.

(I refer you to what Nightward said)
The_Ogre
04/18/02 10:03 PM
67.243.57.158

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I hardly think a 21 year old is qualified to explain that no man will ever understand a woman.

Yeesh.
"We will bring you the limp and beaten body of Bob Barker!"
Nightward
04/18/02 10:07 PM
203.134.12.8

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Women have a greater natural aptitude for Science than men, and they are smarter than us. Lots smarter. I tested at IQ 148 and most of the women I know at Uni make me feel stupid.

On the other hand, men have a better natural aptitude for Math than women. You have chosen the wrong field, my friend
Yea, verily. Let it be known far and wide that Nightward loathes MW: DA. Indeed, it is with the BURNING ANIMUS OF A THOUSAND SUNS that he doth rage against it with.
KamikazeJohnson
04/19/02 12:12 AM
209.202.47.12

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>>I hardly think a 21 year old is qualified to explain that no man will ever understand a woman. <<

What's to explain? I was under the impression that it's been common knowledge for about 4000 years...
Peace is that glorious moment in history when everyone stands around reloading.
--Thomas Jefferson
Bob_Richter
04/20/02 05:10 AM
134.121.157.14

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I'm 20, and believe me....I'm FULLY qualified.
-Bob (The Magnificent) Richter

Assertions made in this post are the humble opinion of Bob.
They are not necessarily statements of fact or decrees from God Himself, unless explicitly and seriously stated to be so.
:)
The_Ogre
04/20/02 10:33 AM
199.43.32.22

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In reply to:

I'm 20, and believe me....I'm FULLY qualified.




There it is.

Men and Women can understand each other.

But- you are so young, you don't get it yet. It's like learning another language, which is probably something you haven't managed to pack in to your action packed 20 whole years of life.

Don't think I am picking on you just cause of your age, it also has to do with the attitude that you know everything.

Talk to us in ten years... By then you will have learned (I hope anyway) that you can understand women, they just aren't as easy to understand as men.
"We will bring you the limp and beaten body of Bob Barker!"
Bob_Richter
04/20/02 05:21 PM
134.121.247.162

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>>>Don't think I am picking on you just cause of your age, it also has to do with the attitude that you know everything. <<<

Actually, you are. If I was fifty and had the same attitude and opinion, you'd respect it.

But because I'm 20, you assume I'm both inexperienced and arrogant. Typical.

>>>Men and Women can understand each other. <<<

You're a victim of a delusion that one develops with advanced age...:)
-Bob (The Magnificent) Richter

Assertions made in this post are the humble opinion of Bob.
They are not necessarily statements of fact or decrees from God Himself, unless explicitly and seriously stated to be so.
:)
KamikazeJohnson
04/20/02 05:41 PM
209.202.47.12

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>>>Men and Women can understand each other. <<<

>>You're a victim of a delusion that one develops with advanced age...:) <<

Actually, he's right...men and women can understand each other...but both parties have to make an effort to understand and be understood...and that very rarely happens. And I think both sides are equally at fault in most cases :-\
Peace is that glorious moment in history when everyone stands around reloading.
--Thomas Jefferson
NathanKell
04/20/02 06:24 PM
24.44.238.62

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But, of course, it's far easier to be flip.

As this topic shows.
-NathanKell, BT Space Wars
Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blind-folded fear.
Thomas Jefferson
KamikazeJohnson
04/20/02 06:30 PM
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true, but only for the short term. A little effort is worth it for the long haul. My gf and I haven't had any misunderstandings at all, and we've been together for... for... geez, let me see here... must be... wow, almost 3 1/2... weeks!
Peace is that glorious moment in history when everyone stands around reloading.
--Thomas Jefferson
Nightward
04/20/02 08:28 PM
203.134.13.194

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'Old Age' was always 20 years ahead of your current age?
Yea, verily. Let it be known far and wide that Nightward loathes MW: DA. Indeed, it is with the BURNING ANIMUS OF A THOUSAND SUNS that he doth rage against it with.
Black_Phoenix
04/20/02 08:33 PM
207.252.105.136

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As I tell everyone. "Just nod your head, and act like you are listening."
History is much like an endless waltz. The three beats of war, peace and revolution continue on forever.
-Gundam Wing: Endless Waltz

Bob_Richter
04/20/02 11:46 PM
134.121.157.14

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My girlfriend and I were together for two and a half YEARS before it all fell apart. You think you understand someone and then...

...Well, you know.

-Bob (The Magnificent) Richter

Assertions made in this post are the humble opinion of Bob.
They are not necessarily statements of fact or decrees from God Himself, unless explicitly and seriously stated to be so.
:)
Bob_Richter
04/20/02 11:47 PM
134.121.157.14

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Someone's "old" if they're dumb enough to start critisising me for being "young"

I don't take agist crap. I never have, I never will.
-Bob (The Magnificent) Richter

Assertions made in this post are the humble opinion of Bob.
They are not necessarily statements of fact or decrees from God Himself, unless explicitly and seriously stated to be so.
:)
Karagin
04/22/02 10:03 AM
63.173.170.151

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I tried that once...then I got a quiz over what she was talking about via a series of questions...can you guess what happen?

Couches are cold and hard and not comfortable to sleep on...
Karagin

Given time and plenty of paper, a philosopher can prove anything.
The_Ogre
04/22/02 12:32 PM
67.243.57.207

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>Actually, you are. If I was fifty and had the same attitude and opinion, you'd respect it.

Hardly. I'd think you were an opinionated old fart, who knows nothing of women.

>But because I'm 20, you assume I'm both inexperienced and arrogant. Typical.

No- I KNOW you're arrogant. :P

I also can tell you are inexperienced by your reply.

>>>Men and Women can understand each other. <<<

>You're a victim of a delusion that one develops with advanced age...:)

Touche.

I'm not that much older than you- but I do know when to lip off, and when not to. Some folks have enough experience to know one thing. Others have enough experience to know far more.

THAT is what I was pointing out. Now if you were just screwing around, that is one thing.

If not- well I wish you luck in a life soon to be filled with embittered romances.

"We will bring you the limp and beaten body of Bob Barker!"
Spartan
04/22/02 01:19 PM
172.134.168.80

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Absolutely! You don't have to understand or even agree with what she is saying. Just listen enough so that you can tell her what she was talking about if she does decide to quiz you.
Spartan

We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty.

(I refer you to what Nightward said)
Bob_Richter
04/22/02 10:14 PM
134.121.157.14

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>>>No- I KNOW you're arrogant. :P <<<

What you THINK you know is of no concern to me.

-Bob (The Magnificent) Richter

Assertions made in this post are the humble opinion of Bob.
They are not necessarily statements of fact or decrees from God Himself, unless explicitly and seriously stated to be so.
:)
The_Ogre
04/22/02 10:55 PM
67.243.43.66

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Good answer.

Very good.
"We will bring you the limp and beaten body of Bob Barker!"
Black_Phoenix
04/23/02 10:50 PM
207.252.105.159

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*Walks up to both Bob and Ogre. Lifts both of his arms and smacks both on the back of the head. Walks away without saying anything.*

(Just so you know, I have no clue why I typed this up.) :P
History is much like an endless waltz. The three beats of war, peace and revolution continue on forever.
-Gundam Wing: Endless Waltz

damourc
04/23/02 10:55 PM
24.214.83.100

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Gentlemen,
I have been married to my beautiful wife for 11 and a half years now. There are only two things that you need to know to understand women.
And no man has any idea what either of them are! :-)
Chris
Black_Phoenix
04/23/02 10:58 PM
207.252.105.159

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Would those be: 'During "that time" 1) always keep a taser ready & 2) never turn your back? Or are those rules just obvious because of instinct?
History is much like an endless waltz. The three beats of war, peace and revolution continue on forever.
-Gundam Wing: Endless Waltz

Greyslayer
04/24/02 06:11 PM
137.172.211.9

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Well my GF understands me, she brought me Dungeon Seige for nothing other than transporting her around and helping her get a car last week. I didn't ask for the game either.

Now though I suppose the complaint will surface that I am not going to be spending that much time with her... I did warn her about this game .

Greyslayer
novakitty
04/24/02 06:19 PM
192.195.234.26

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I found an odd quote (in a rather odd place) that seems astoundingly relevant to this discussion. In the form of fatherly advice:

Remember these two pieces of advice.

The first is to be able to when you're beat and to say "yes dear" as soon as you realize you're in an argument.

And the second is to never take any (explative deleted) from anyone but your wife!
meow
Spartan
04/25/02 02:26 PM
172.143.72.142

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To quote Rodney Carrington, "I don't take no crap from anybody else but you."
Spartan

We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty.

(I refer you to what Nightward said)
Cheapbuzz
04/26/02 05:14 PM
131.36.116.42

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"There are only two things that you need to know to understand women. And no man has any idea what either of them are!" This is the truest bit of information that I have ever read in my entire life.
Diablo
04/29/02 07:16 PM
209.239.13.202

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now that's the way to get women. proper Ettiquette and gentlemeness are the ways to go. now if only women thought that....
"whats that bluish fuzzy thing on your head?"
-Luciphear to Talis, just before he exploded.

www.geocitis.com/luciph34r
Nightward
04/30/02 05:58 AM
203.134.12.8

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Yeah. I dunno. I think that women these days are so used to being treated with contempt that being treated properly pretty much shuts their brains down.

You can profit quite a lot in the ensuing confusion. I get a lot of help from my female lab partners that way. They are still trying to catch up with being called "ma'am" that they are willing to share their notes and information with you. This makes the lab a *LOT* easier, mostly because I do not have to think.

On another note, I now have long hair and am being judged for it. Walking out of a music store, I was searched. I get three times the personal space I used to get in crowds. And people scurry out of my way. I think I need a haircut.
Yea, verily. Let it be known far and wide that Nightward loathes MW: DA. Indeed, it is with the BURNING ANIMUS OF A THOUSAND SUNS that he doth rage against it with.
KamikazeJohnson
04/30/02 07:37 PM
209.202.47.12

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>>I get three times the personal space I used to get in crowds. And people scurry out of my way. I think I need a haircut. <<

I'd call that a good thing...at least if you spend a lot of time navigating through crowds
Peace is that glorious moment in history when everyone stands around reloading.
--Thomas Jefferson
Cheapbuzz
04/30/02 08:19 PM
165.76.24.52

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I've been married for six years and I have the exact same problem.
The_Ogre
04/30/02 09:53 PM
63.16.239.78

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That's THE Ogre to you pal.

:P
"We will bring you the limp and beaten body of Bob Barker!"
Black_Phoenix
04/30/02 11:09 PM
207.252.105.171

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You, sir, are not worthy of the the title 'The'. You are just plain yogurt...oops, wrong joke. I mean, you are just plain Ogre.
History is much like an endless waltz. The three beats of war, peace and revolution continue on forever.
-Gundam Wing: Endless Waltz

DrunkenSufi
05/15/02 10:43 PM
66.79.34.194

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Men aren't meant to understand women, they're just supposed to marry and impregnate.

Then you're supposed to spend the next thirty years of your life wondering why on Earth you married them.

Finally after 38 years of marriage you come to the conclusion that it doesn't matter because you're both geriatric and everything is academic.
Got Muhammed?
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